This project has been very fragmented due to my original set space getting cut. I am disappointed not to have continued with this challenging design project however it has taught me to be more pushy with future projects and next year I want to realise a live design brief. The buying for the show gave me a chance to take on a role similar to a supervisor, this has confirmed my desire to take on a supervising position next year. I have become more aware of my strengths during this buying position and realise I am more of a practical worker and strive off the collaboration with others. In the future I would rather work on live projects like this one that involve physical and practical work rather than doing a reclusive design project that I find isolating. Buying was a challenge, as I had to fit all the shopping in and adhere to everyone demands whilst simultaneously working out the budget restraints. I enjoyed the position however I wanted to have more control over the other areas of the show such as organising the costume rails; interacting with the actors, I am disappointed that I did not take on a more major role. I would have rather concentrated all my attention on a larger position such a supervising than try to tackle lots of little projects at the same time. I have gained confidence in my ability to manage large quantities of money, I now believe that I can be given the responsibility to take charge of the financial side to live show, this is going to be very beneficial to me when taking on other buying or supervising roles, and I will use my new found skills in work experience at the National Theatre. Curating the exhibition was not something I would have chosen for my self-directed project, however I found it rewarding in the end. It was a consolation prize for not being able to realise my set design, I enjoyed the buying process for the exhibition however I was not able to achieve everything I wanted due to the budget. I was demonstrative in my approach to the exhibition process and fought to get enough money to buy some quality frames even if this did mean the designers only exhibited two designs. I wanted the exhibition to be quality not quantity and I think this is reflected in the final result. I am disappointed with the lack of respect and attention that was given to the exhibition space, as a fellow designer I would expect my graduate work to be admired and not made feel as though it is an after thought. The audience was ushered though and past the exhibition, which was out of my control and neatly sums up the disorganised nature of my fragmented self directed project. Though this seems very negative I have enjoyed the flexibility of my project and feel I have benefited more form its diversity and the wrong goings than I would have doing a smooth running comfortable project. I was inspired by the task to dress the helping hands it enabled me to engage with some of the actors making me crave a larger supervising position in the show. I overcame some of my fears such as measuring actors; as a designer I am out of practice and this has made me realise that next year I want to get more involved with the fitting processes in a live show in order to develop my skills as an all round supervisor. The poster was a fresh and exciting challenge that I used to express my creativity, as a practical designer I find it easier to show my abilities through action and collaboration. The success of the poster has given me more confidence with my ability to direct others in a team and encouraged me take on a design position on a film next year. Even though I didn’t decide the costume I did design the look and aesthetic of the poster and this is essentially what a designer does which I am pleased to have learnt. I will take this realisation into my third year by developing my confidence as a hands-on designer and not being afraid of the design process. This diverse self-directed project was a good learning curve having to juggle of a million tasks at once; it has prepared me for a more demanding supervising role, which is my main aim for developing my skills next year.

The fitting week was a challange as the buyer, I had to be very proactive and it has helped my organization skills as i have been juggling my buying with the being at uni and liasing with the supervisors from all the costume sections. The job is broad and I find myself learning the roles of a supervisor which is important for me as i a keen to take on more supervising roles. The challange has been keeping to the strict budget given by the uni, I have overcome this by price comparing and finding the best bargains and cheapest shops. I have learnt the importance of comprimising as I have to keep to the budget which is of key importance and therefore let the supervisors know that they cant have everything!

This project is a challenge as my clients are the third years and as they have now finished there work they justifiably are busy or have gone home to relax. This has been tough as I am relying on them to give me feedback and help me realize the space. However I am using the oppertunity to take over and be the creative force behind the exhibition. This will give me the chance to fulfill my desire to design and gain experience in creating a live project. In the future I will remember that I had a tricky time communicating with some people during the live project and have the confidence to take control of the situation. I am beginning to realize that you can not rely on anyone in this industry and things are changing so rapidly that you have to stay on your toes and be prepared for the worst! I feel a lot more relaxed about things changing now during SDP that I am making sure I have thought of all the possibilities before I make any concrete decisions this process of thorough investigation is sure to help me in the future.

The new proposal for my SDP is to curate the exhibition space for the third year designers, this is not something that I would have originally chosen as I wanted to have more of a design role. However what SDP has taught me so far is to go with the flow and be flexible so I am going to put all my energy into creating a professional look for the exhibition.

The project has been interesting as I had to make sure that all the departemnt from costume, acting to marketing were happy with the final poster. This meant I had to listen and change things at the drop of a hat, this was good for me as I realise that to be a designer you are not always doing your own thing you have to collaborate with others to reach the final look. It was an exciting challenge to meet these requiernemtn and i had to show all the departments a series of final ina,ge inorder for them to shoae the best that would suit the poster. I did not feel rejected if they didnt like some of the images as I had learnt by now that my feeling were not important it is. I have learnt not to feel rejected if someone doesnt like one of my ideas and they way i overcame this was to have many option for the departments to chose from this meant that there was a chance they would at least approve of one. this is a big development for me as in the past I have been too sensitive about my work, the poster helped me to be expereimental but not emotionally involved. I saw the poster design as a professional job rather than a "project" as it was essentially the collaboration of the all the departmets that allowed me to create the final poster. I found that having all the opinion of the departments pushed me to creative a better piece of work, it made me confident nowing I had been given the chance to take on the poster and I will use this to push myself futher in future projects.

I was under pressure to get the poster done to the deadline set by the university, to begin with i was terrified and thought i would not be able to complete it in time. However the pressure only helped me to work more efficiently. The experience showed me how it feels to have people relying on you to produce a creative piece of work for a live performance, this is beneficial for my future as a designer and will give me the confidence in my ability. I had to communicate with the marketing department and this was an interesting experience as they were not seeing the project from a creative point of view they were seeing from marketing eyes. This is not a negative it just made me aware that there are were other departments that I was working for and I had to be flexible to work to everyones demands. This has given me the confidence to to work alongside other professionals as I was dealing with members of staff and they were relying on me which gave me a sense of purpose. I had to be flexible with my time inorder to organise meetings with the relevent members of the marketing staff. It was a daunting experice having to talk to anyone other than my tutors about my own work. It was very different, i couldnt make excuses for my work as I was trying to sell my idea, this will help in the furutre as I have learnt how to positively talk about my work without being negative which is what i do when i am trying to protect myself. I have learnt the importance of being confident infront of the people I am working for as this will enevitably make them believe in my abilities and I will create better work if I belive in myself.

The challenge for the shoot was the timing, I had to organize the setting up of the studio with the photographer, overseeing the hair and makeup for the model and the dressing of the model. The costume is very delicate and large so it took a team of us to dress the model and get the dress to set. In the future I will use these time management skills that I have learnt in all my work. The success of the shoot was down to the preparation and communication between myself the model and photographer, I also had a dresser that had made the costume, this was helpful as she understood the restrictions of the costume. I was under pressure to direct both the model and photographer and I quickly learnt that I could not control every element of the shoot. The spontaneity of the shoot on the day made it so successful and in the future I will be relaxed and prepared to adapt myself to any situation. The project has taught me how to collaborate with other creative people and has given me the confindence to drive a project myself. I have gained experience as a designer in this shoot and as a stylist, I felt that the active, creative role that i played suited my outgoing personality and this is a positive strength that I will continue to develop to become a good designer.